All Kinds of Jazzy Shit!

Edith Piaf - Non, je ne regrette rien

...sometimes.
To set the mood I have here tracks from C R W N. His music sets a really subtle intimate mood.


More of the intimacy with the environment and the things around. Not just towards people. A little like how Tycho or maybe Spazzkid. or Stwo. or maybe more of Speak.

At the same time, I was also reading this book, Bird by Angela Johnson. It's about thirteen year olds running away from several things. They then have come to realize how to deal with heart breaks and not romantic heart aches. One boy would be dealing with the death of his younger brother. Another boy is dealing with growing up with a congenital heart disease. I'll stop there. It's a short book. One of the phrases that stuck with me though would be

"Nothing Makes You Feel Good sometimes".

Yes. Nothing feels good.
Reminds me of a theory I had when I was in 10th grade. People go about their lives empty. With a hole in their heart. Throughout people's lives, they look at several things to fill in that emptiness - the opposite sex, hobbies, games, work, travels and other less amicable platforms such as alcohol, smoking and drugs. Some people, those who never tried looking got stuck somewhere with the wrong key in their socket. Those people end up unhappy or wanting more. Some people find the right fit. Some people find nothing, which is for me, better than having something totally unnatural.

Reminds me, 2 weeks ago I was scavenging through heaps and heaps of audio over the web and I came across some really interesting music and podcasts. I also re-stumbled upon Radiolab and got to listen to a podcast related to nihilism itself.

http://www.radiolab.org/story/dust-planet/

I'm curious I'll probably get a copy of this book.

In the Dust of This Planet. Catchy!

I've been into Radiolab for a while now. For maybe 2 years already? Radiolab is a podcast of different natures with a mix of science. The hosts, Jad and Robert, tackle several topics in a very sensational way of storytelling. My favorites would be the shorts. Those shorts are backed up by some spectacular writing and intense sound effects and it just brings so much emotion compared to other ordinary podcasts. Have a listen. Don't worry about the science parts, they explain it so well that I think, even if I were only 10 years old, I'd still understand what they are saying.

Ohh. I'm starting to love late mornings alone.

Here we have a screenful of colors,
With smiling made up faces,
Shining seamless wears,
And synchronized body movements.

On cue one - entrance clap,
Unending friendly hellos.

On cue two - lined up glass bottles,
Unending beer refills.

On cue three - pure white dust,
Unending boom of invincibility.

Follow banal patterns -
Pixels scattered and checkered.
Beating lines rising high and low.
Non-stop blinking boxes.
Eyes closed and then blackness.
Whistling in the dark.

"We promise you,
You'll be all better."

Today's playlist: CAZZETTE and Knife Party

Infinity Shred's good music have set a nice studying mood today.



I want to know and learn so many things. I am a hungry dragon seeking for knowledge. To know, for me, is to feel secure and grounded. To know, for me, adds value to the self and hopefully, also to the soul. It feeds me and I am greedy. I lust for books, for articles, for videos, for information. Maybe one of the reasons why I enslave my talents to the information industry.

I am curious and it could kill me. But I have to continue on reading, I have to beat on and continue to know. It brings me so much excitement to know. It fills me and at the same time it makes me hungry. It outbalances and balances.


I want to know who, what, how, when, where, why. I want to know. I want to consume so bad that I fear that I am consumed by something bigger that someday I'll know about.


And I forget other things. I ignore other things. Other things that could be or not be important to me but is relevant. But I can't stop.

It's such a gratifying feeling to know that someone else in this world loves you unconditionally and would be so horrified to live without you. I can't help but be happy.

The simple words and actions, the small deeds that someone else does to tell you that you are cherished and loved makes the heart overflow with joy.

"...it seemed that his heart would be shaken out of his body so great was its ecstasy."

I wish everyone to feel the same.

Heartfelt music by Wyatt
Honest title from Damned by Chuck Palahniuk
Happy quote from Call of the Wild by Jack London

I am as busy as the rain clouds today. So many people and things to rain on today. I'll just dance through the night until all work is over.

I am busy yet I am happy. It's a nice happy. I'm also excited.

So many things to learn. I need to catch up.

I just finished a book over some warm pandesal yesterday. Blink by the Malcolm Gladwell. It's a great book for marketeers. I'll talk about it soon.

Can't stop moving, we gotta go and seize the night.

After I get through today's work, I will play Watch Dogs Til' Dawn...

keep my Eyes Open until I finish Act III.

But before all that, I need to Get It Together,

do my best and Seize the Night.


Good music from Foxe Basin
Good remix from Tobtok
Good bread from Pan de Manila

No dream can last forever,
unless this chase becomes a fever,
Not a sickness, more of a disease.
A false sense that we can do things with ease,
A false thought of gleeful aspirations,
A false hope on getting there with no altercations.
Nothing can be done in a breeze,
You're there in an indefinite freeze,
While others progress in leaps and bounds.
Time to sleep on cold ground.
Envy tastes so bitter on the tongue
Carry on and come back in a bang.
Get up, you can't wait much to long


Some thoughts up above
Some Herman Hesse on the title
Some EchoDroides to listen to

I have nothing on my mind.



No worries. No skeptics. Just fresh rainy season air.



It's a dark and rainy day here in Manila. It's all cool and cold.

I heard a storm is coming over again. Be safe everyone!

But I haven't figured it out.



Alas, I need to re-examine myself.

I need to realize my short-comings before I bite the bullet.
And before it's all too late.

Ah, decisions, relations, and inhibitions.

On the side note, congratulations to Germany and the winning goal scorer, Mario Gotze. I really wanted Germany to win the FIFA World Cup 2014.

I'm listening to MTNS today. Such a cool and minty music for a cool and breezy day.

A while ago, a guy friend asked me how long does it take for girls to get over anyone/anything. He's in a quite a stupor right now. The gal he's dating seems to be stuck in dreaming of reconciling with her ex. She's still in a daze of her previous relationship which was purportedly also the girl's best friend for a long time. Rad. I told him to decide slowly and think on how much she likes this girl. But if this ensues, have an honest talk and confess on how awkward it is for him to be dating some one who still seems to be taken by someone else. Anyway, I hope him good luck.

From my experience, I realize that the best way to get over anything is to be busy with something else. When I have something interesting on hand, I usually lose track of time. Well, I can't speak for everyone. Only time can tell.

Lost Track of Time


It really is all up to you. For some people, they have a hard time moving on because of their own fears and insecurities.

Fears


In the mean time, enjoy the music of MTNS

When I am not able to listen to music, more likely, I will lack motivation to do good. It's a mental thing and I know, I need to learn. But having a beat in your head that you can follow to while moving about your business at work and at home is really helpful.

I am very simple-minded to the point of naivety. I take joy from simple things and I prefer looking at things in it's simplest, truest form. I like doing things with less, maximizing all means, utilizing my time well.

I feel that in doing things, whether it be cooking a traditional meal or jogging, the simplest method is king. I think I get far more substance with it as well. I feel more fulfilled with taking enough, rather than being overwhelmed with too much. Having too much just complicates my psycho. I don't know what to do with it.

The more I know, the more I feel that I don't know. The more people I am with, the more I feel alone. The more food I eat, the more problems I get health-wise. The more meds I take, the more I feel weak. The more groups I belong to, the more I feel that I don't belong. The bigger the house I get, the more it feels less like home. The more cash I get, the more needy and poor I become. Is it just me or does this age just necessitates multiple layers of complexities - of misunderstandings?

Things, events, relationships are there for a purpose and isn't that purpose all that's there is to be. It's always better to have that reset button where things, people, events, become just the way they are supposed to be.

It's strange how everyone just wants more.

Maybe it's Time To Realize the real purpose of things and stop and focus there.


My mom said once, the best way to know if an ice cream company has good quality ice cream is to taste their vanilla ice cream. She said this because if you find joy in it's simplest truest form, it probably is a really good ice cream.

Up there is a Vonnegut flavored Title and some fluffy Lemaitre songs

Phew. It's been a while. I have nothing new on me right now. Just a thought or a side note that things I want can't all be mine. I need to learn to wait things out. For it to bear a sweeter fruit. I'm too hasty. With everything. Whether it be in baking, relationships, the stock market or in my career, I need to wait. I need the right timing.

Well, when everything's looking dim, I could just always submerge myself into deeper thought by listening to music.



Here's a a product of my devastation over losing things because of not waiting.

The Stock Market
I have no problem with you.
I don't mind your looks, nor your romance books,
It's just you don't give a flying fuck
whether you're stepping on someone else's luck.
Greedy Grinch, who can't be in a pinch,
We'll it's just game, we try, we lose and face the shame.
Praise God when we earn some gains,
Curse him when we lose the reigns.
But hey, you're free as a bird,
You have a brain to think and observe,
Don't go about on whatever's been heard.
And you can't blame me nor the Father Almighty,
Wolf, it just had to be.
Dang, I really feel bad for letting go of that DD.
The Society, people together for sobriety
but unfortunately, there's you and me,
Selfish and giddy,
who just can't help it but watch and be folly.
It's over. Enough.
All throughout I was smiling,
Well, bets are down, with regretful growls,
Too bad, fool, you thought you were winning.
You can't always win like the Gracies.

P.S. Chuck Palanhiuk's Rant on Title

Change always happens for the better. Maybe I'm a little too optimistic but I believe that the changes that have driven to be at the present are meant to be. I'm not saying everything is destined. It's a question of being. I think, it's just, those with the power to will things have willed things. Those who have ignored or failed to command their lives have let others, may it be other people or just certain events, will things for or against them.